by
Secret1984
@ Thursday, 21. Sep, 2006 - 12:50:46 pm
June 2nd 2006 –
Today I decided I would like to be a wedding planner. Organise huge weddings along with various other events. I have looked into event management/wedding planning diplomas and think I will start a diploma next month. I will also start looking for a new job within an events company.
June 13th 2006 –
I’m on holiday in Cuba with K and after seeing the giant killer whale blow up swimming pool float, I have remembered a dream I once had of working with dolphins/whales as a marine mammal trainer. I will look into this when I get home.
June 16th 2006 –
I have written to about 40 companies across the world that work with marine animals to ask them what I will need to do to get into that field. They have started to reply to tell me that although a degree is not necessary, it is desired. I would also need to work on my swimming, complete a SCUBA qualification (could be a problem as I hate fish) and start to do some volunteer work with animals (this again could be a problem as I already have NO time to do anything! – a job with animals whilst studying my degree is the way forward). Degree; could be too much like hard work, will have to think about this A LOT before I seriously consider this career.
June 17th 2006 –
Today K and I done a 1 hour christening party for AAA. LOVE doing parties; love not working in an office and being active all the time. Maybe I’ll do parties part time and get a part time job in an office as the money is good doing parties???
June 26th 2006 –
Thinking A LOT about my career options at the moment; now edging back towards events and wedding planning because it’s a more realistic career… although I LOVE the idea of working with mammals. Have read and re-read the Open University prospectus a zillion times. Thinking about doing the open degree regardless of my career choice as this would open doors in psychology too… oooh, maybe I’ll become a child psychologist like I wanted to be about 7 years ago???
June 28th 2006 –
Right, I have thought about it again and again and have decided that as you only live once, I need to do what I really want to do which is train as a marine mammal trainer. I’m going to start my open degree at the end of the year when I’m settled financially. I’m going to stay at MRC whilst I study for 4 years… this will give me good stickability on my CV and I’m going to volunteer with animals if I can find the time!!! Marine mammal trainer, here I come!
June 29th 2006 –
9am - Have decided that the best foot into working with marine mammals is going to be experience and therefore I need to start working with animals as soon as possible whilst I’m studying my degree. I’ve sent an application to ‘Tiggywinkles’ for an ‘animal management’ apprenticeship in Aylesbury which I would study and then work on my degree after. By the time I finished, I’d be about 26, 5 years hands on experience and a degree and ready to emigrate to wherever to work with marine mammals.
11am - Have looked into working at a veterinary practice to gain experience with animals. Going to write to them all and either ask for vacancies as admin or maybe I’ll train as a vet nurse and get real hands on experience and then maybe, I could be a Vet???
11:30am – Have shared my idea about being a Vet with K, she advises that they have the highest rate of suicide in the UK and US as the job is very mundane and not that great… maybe I won’t be a vet??? Will re-think my options!
10pm – Looked at entry qualifications into London Veterinary School to train as an actual Veterinary Surgeon (money’s much better than being a nurse!!!) and it appears to be the hardest thing EVER to get in to. Minimum requirement of 5 GCSE’s at grade A!!! Or, I could do a Degree and THEN go to Vet school for 5 YEARS! I’d be studying forever… surely there’s a cheat way in?! Maybe you can become a surgeon by default after being a nurse for 2 years?! LOL!!!... Okay, dream on!
June 30th 2006 –
Spent a lot of time last night researching careers as a Veterinary nurse. The money is crap (as it is with all nursing) but then there are other benefits such as free accommodation?! Can’t lose!!! I have therefore sent 31 letters and CV’s to Veterinary surgerys around Berks this morning asking whether they offer apprenticeships within nursing. I have also suggested I wouldn’t mind doing an admin role to start with?! Any way into the field is better than none!
10:22am – I have emailed Tiggywinkles further to my application yesterday as an apprentice in animal care to ask whether they would consider putting me through an apprenticeship as a veterinary nurse… will await the outcome.
10:30am – I have also worked out by training as a veterinary nurse, I wouldn’t actually have to study a degree to be a marine mammal trainer!!! As a degree is not essential and just desired, I have checked and qualified veterinary nurses are very much welcomed in these roles! Nursing IS the way forward… just not sure how I’ll pay my bills in the meantime! Maybe I’ll declare myself bankrupt prior to training?!
3:00pm – Today I had lunch with SC who done her usual and made me realise that I could have a fantastic career at MRC. I could gradually train to be a consultant and make A LOT of money – just not working alongside MM who treated me as a general dogs body… I DO have options here and now I’m thinking the grass might not be greener? Maybe I’ll study a degree anyway… OR, maybe I’ll do that photography course I wanted to do… that way I could stay here and have a profression in something else?! OH, who knows… will see what the Veterinary practices say about opportunities; quite like the idea of working with animals now!
July 1st 2007 –
I’m going to be a dental hygienist! Definitely – little training, easy to get into and my mum works for a bloody dentistry practice! All I need is for her to speak to EVERYONE at work, tell them I want to do it and hope they’ll offer me a training package! Have my heart set on it now; only need 5 A-C GCSE’s and I have 10 – LOTS of jobs available and LOTS of money to be earned! WOO HOO for this clever career move – no degrees, no lack of funds, just a FANTASTIC idea! Must speak to mum!
9pm – Was asked by MR what my latest career plans are, explained my hygienist idea (along with every other idea I’ve had recently and also explained I would like to do volunteer work in Africa AND China and save the world!!!) – he thinks I need to channel all my enthusiasm into one thing. I’ve told him I try but nothing grounds me for long enough!!!
July 3rd 2007 –
12pm – phoned mum to see whether she has spoken to Arthur about my hygienist idea?! She said he’s very busy today and therefore she’ll try later today but it may be tomorrow! Seriously woman… you need to be talking to these people for me!
4pm – Had a team meeting, burst into tears about what a failure I was as a consultant, very stupid of me! I now feel very unsettled again about my career at MRC… need to do something with my life!!!
July 4th 2007 –
12:11pm – I f**king HATE my job. Today nothing is going to plan, I’m in the frame of mind that I can’t be bothered to do anything EVER; no work, no studies, no debt/bills etc… Just want to earn as much money as possible for as little work as possible! HATE IT HERE!!!
12:39pm – Am thinking about setting up my own dating website?! No idea what it would be called though or how I would do this?! I’ve found a website which will help me do this but I need to work out costings etc and need some help with it really! But it would provide pocket money… something to look into!
2pm – Have a voicemail from Tiggywinkles asking me to call them back on Thursday/Friday to answer some ‘questions’ – LOVE the idea of working with the animals and doing the training course but DON’T love the idea of crap money… will call them Thursday to discuss this regardless…
2:45pm – I’m going to work for MI5… why have I not thought of this before… out and about ALL the time, I could be like SPOOKS!!! Travel the world on secret assignments… MUST look into it!!!
July 5th 2006 –
So I looked into being a ‘spook’ yesterday, I passed the initial test online and printed an application form which was about 70 pages long and this completely put me off so I’m not going for it anymore.
3pm – So I need to call Tiggywinkles back tomorrow and I also got a voicemail from ‘NM Veterinary Hospital’ today offering me an interview next Thursday at 10am as a trainee veterinary nurse. I REALLY want to do this but the money is appalling (I don’t actually know what it is but she said it’s miles away from what I’m on!) and therefore I can’t afford to. Not going to reject the interview just yet… will ponder on it this weekend and may go for the interview regardless.
4pm – Going to send K my ‘career diary’ for her to review my thought process regarding my veterinary interview on Thursday of next week. Also want to register at recruitment agencies now to look at other jobs. Although having a good work day today (purely because I got a free lunch and been very productive!) so this makes me feel bad about looking around. Think I’ll register with agencies, be VERY specific about what I’m looking for and then sit back and wait. Would ideally like to be here for Barcelona in January too which is an issue?!? Choices, choices!!!
4:15pm – OH MY GOD! Private Investigator… what a GOOD idea?! Why had I not thought about this before?! I could become a private investigator. It has everything I require, flexibility, not office based all the time, LOTS of variety and interest and good money I would imagine!? Will investigate this tonight. Probably right letters to private investigators.
7pm – Right, I wasn’t going to bother re-applying to Virgin but the application form arrived today and I think it would be rude not to?! I’ve therefore completed the application, written a grovelling letter, attached my CV and full length photos as requested (Virgin ones to really impress them!!!) and I’ve also attached a customer service letter saying that I’m bloody marvellous… what other evidence do they want that I deserve to be taken back?!! Forget that in my resignation letter I slaughtered the lifestyle and the money!
July 6th 2006 –
9am – Prepared my Virgin letter etc for postage and going to post it today. Hopefully will get an interview at the least?!?!
11am – Had a conversation with MW (the current squeeze) about his ‘salad’ restaurant idea which I LOVE and wish he would do it! Also looked to see whether there was a cheesecake factory in London which there isn’t and therefore think they are missing a BIG trick. Discussed this with MW, investigated whether it was a franchise, it’s not, and therefore nothing that can be done.
6pm – OH MY GOD, this job is HELL!!! Why oh why do they wait until 4pm to start giving me major reports to do with shit loads of graphs and charts that need to be completed ‘before I leave’. Bearing in mind I’m only paid until 5:30pm and I have plans this evening with K! They expect so fucking much for minimal in return and it pisses me off. I was this close to telling JF to shove his job up his arse about 5 minutes ago when he said to me “smile!” – you fucking smile you wanker!!!! And KC… she’s fucked off running with TDC at 5:15pm after leaving me to deliver on the promises she’s made to her client! And what thanks will I get… NONE!
July 7th 2006 –
10:25am – Right, I would really like to do admin for a magazine or something? Some sort of huge media company with big clients and lots of potential to train and move up the ladder. This of course being that Virgin don’t take me back because if they do, I’m going back to them and I’m then going to do a part time photography course and become a professional photographer in the future. But, being that Virgin don’t take me back (and I survive tomorrows skydive!!!) I will look into working for big media companies such as TCS or for a magazine like Cosmopolitan. That WOULD be cool!!! Actually, will look into it now!
10:30am – JUST THOUGHT IT! I could work for a radio station doing admin! Or a football team! Or something equally as cool?!!? Right, going to write another letter and set up a merge for companies who would be cool to work for such as Kiss 100 and Two-10 FM (as that’s in Berkshire and far more convenient!!!) Loving my new proactive approach. Although I really would like to stay at MRC just to see Barcelona out which won’t be until January?! Hmmm, what to do?!
4pm – I know I don’t want to be at MRC, even more so since my meeting with TDC which has just finished where she told me about the route my new role as ‘Central Support Coordinator’ is going to take. I do not want to be here; but I don’t want to let anyone down!? Just had a voicemail from Charlotte at Warwick Jones, she has some opportunities she’d like to discuss with me and I was going to call her back but then I decided against it, although I’m not sure why? So I may call her… oh, who knows what I should do!?!? I know one thing, this weekend I will prepare my merge for ‘cool companies’ to work for and post them on Monday. That is definitely the way forward!!!
… Also, decided against calling Tiggywinkles back, they’re only going to want me to work for c.£10k and I can’t afford it!!!
5pm – Called Warwick Jones expecting Charlotte to have LOADS of opportunities to talk to me about, as per her voicemail; but she said “I remember you, you’re the girl that entertained at David & Victoria Beckhams World Cup Party” – really wish that wasn’t on my CV now, that’s exactly what I’ll be remembered for! She clearly didn’t read my CV properly as she assumed I was only working part time at weekends and all the ‘opportunities’ she had for me were ‘temporary’. She’s now going to forward my CV to her ‘perms’ consultant and they will call me if anything applicable comes up! This is why I write letters and go direct, recruitment consultants are a pain! (Forget that I work for a recruitment company!!!)
July 8th 2006 –
10pm – Just home from skydiving and want to be… an INSTRUCTOR!!! How amazing would that be?! It was the most amazing feeling I’ve ever had and I feel completely liberated! The only problem, you need 8 hours of freefall under your belt to become an instructor, each jump costs roughly £250 and in each jump you only get 30 seconds of freefall; therefore c.£240,000 to qualify as an instructor!!! So, I’m thinking I need to work as admin for a skydiving company which would enable me to jump for free whenever I want to!!! So, writing a letter…
July 10th 2006 –
1:20pm – Got another call from Tiggywinkles today, not sure I’ll bother phoning them back, I’m over my vet phase, crap money and smelling of animals daily… this is not a good thing!
8:33pm - Finished my skydiving letter, going to post it tomorrow, could only find one company locally so unless I relocate, not sure I can work for a skydiving company at all… this is a problem!!!
July 11th 2006 –
9am – Feel completely deflated since skydiving now I’m back in this depressing office and need to find out how I can do it professionally. Sent 6 letters this morning along with my CV to ‘cool companies’ such as Reading Football Club, 2-tenfm radio, Reading 107fm and The London Parachute School etc etc – If I have to do something administrative, I would at least like to do it for a cool company!!!
9:30am – My obsession with skydiving is clearly irritating everyone! TDC is suggesting joining the army so I can get some dives under my belt but I’m not loving the idea of the regime and army lifestyle etc… I will not be told what to do at the best of times, let alone for a career!!! I DO NOT want to join the army! Completely over being a vet… would like to go back to Virgin as then I could study something in my spare time (as I had LOADS of it) but haven’t heard anything from them yet and it’s unlikely they’ll have me back.
12pm – Conversation with the admin team in the ‘admin team meeting’ led me to think I could be an author. I think I’m going to send my ‘career diary’ to a lot of publishing companies and then maybe I’ll get a huge advance and be able to quit MRC and be an author?!?! HOW COOL would that be?! Alternatively, back to Virgin and train as a photographer in the meantime? Maybe this is a good plan.
2:20pm – Just had a VERY interesting conversation with AAA! She has an album coming out, at the end of the year, children’s nursery songs turned pop songs called “The Big Album for Little People!” – she’s going to be huge and wants me and K to run the empire, this will be awesome! She said that by the end of the year, she’ll be busy enough to give us full time work, I’m going to re-emphasise how much I want this tomorrow when I go to fix her bloody computer and I’m also going to re-emphasise her putting an advert in families west for Berkshire and Buckinghamshire. This would be perfect, I could work for AAA and do photography and skydiving in my spare time! Just now sure how much spare time I would have?!
July 12th 2006 –
3pm – WHY O WHY am I still here at MRC?! I’m bored stupid, I HATE it here, I have NO enthusiasm, NO spark anymore and I want to be at home or ANYWHERE that isn’t here! I’m completely over the changes! I don’t want to mother the admin team; I don’t want to work in ‘central support’ with TDC where she is basically changing every process and I’m just going with it; I don’t want to be admin and I don’t want to be a consultant! Nor do I want to go on client visits if it means just client visits with MM?! What’s the point?! I need to be going out and about with SC and KC too if we’re going to do that! I hope Virgin give me a 2nd chance, that would be the IDEAL situation! (I also eat WAY too much today which has put me on 18 points or so eaten out of 20 for the day! FUCKING Weight Watchers!!!)
9:43pm – I can’t remember when exactly but sometime in the last week I lost my mind!?! For some strange reason, I’m having the most fun at work when I’m being naughty! Hehe! Such as throwing away the forks after I’ve finished my lunch, or deleting the DHL advertising file when I KNOW SC's still working on an advert?! I don’t know what’s wrong with me but it makes me laugh at the moment! It’s like I’m rebelling against MRC. I am also at my happiest when talking about skydiving, that one definitely won’t wear thin and I need to talk about it as much as possible as it puts me in a constant good mood! Finally; Steve Bloss from Wellington College emailed me today regarding some vacancies they still have there. I emailed him earlier this week as I know they offer FANTASTIC benefits etc. The only problem, I think they need someone to work Saturday mornings, which will be a problem with my AAA, so I definitely need to think about these things when at interview. Saying that, if the moneys £28,000 per annum as I think it is, and you also get your own office, I may be tempted!!!
July 13th 2006 –
So I’m sick today. Not sure if I actually am sick or I’ve just convinced myself I am for a longer weekend?! I think I’ll stick to thinking I AM sick and then I won’t feel so unethical about the whole thing. Saying that, it’s not like I haven’t been working since 8am!!! Okay, forget the 2 and a half hours I watched ‘Memoirs of a Geicha’ – which is fantastic by the way! Never the less I have managed to get shit loads done (more than I have all week) and I have now emailed some bits over to the girls for them to help out which I think is only fair seen as I’m sick and H said the office was ‘very quiet’!
At some point this morning I spoke to a recruitment agency about meeting them tomorrow, have since changed my mind and cancelled my appointment. Story of my life at the moment – want to leave MRC but FAR too loyal and also want to know whats happening at Virgin before I do anything rash! Have heard nothing back from Steve Bloss today regarding opportunities at Wellington College, maybe my salary expectations are too high?! Who knows!
6pm – www.reed.co.uk has become an addiction again! I can’t help but check it daily, apply for a zillion jobs and then when the agencies call me and want me to register, I decide the job doesn’t sound that great and I don’t bother going! BUT… I have just seen a job online for a property company which sounds FAB so I called Huntress Search and spoke to a Melanie about my experience. She is keen to meet me and I am going to see her tomorrow at 2pm. I am so keen to go back to flying though, so if I got this job and then that came up I don’t know what I would do; so really, I should apply for anything until I know whether I have an interview at Virgin. These are all things to think about!
July 14th 2006 –
2pm – had an appointment with Melanie from Huntress today after doing stupid word exams and a typing test at their offices in Bracknell. Melanie was very nice and thinks I would be perfect for the role at Property V – I have to agree with her but this could be because they have GORGEOUS offices and are paying upto £30k basic salary! I REALLY want this job – hopefully I’ll get an interview next week and it’ll be in the bag! On top of that, they have an office in the South of France… in Nice of all places! Only my 2nd favourite place in the world, 2nd only to LA. WOO HOO for Property V! I NEED that job!
July 15th 2006 –
I received a letter from Virgin this morning; I knew it was from them as soon as I saw the envelope and I knew what it was going to say by the size of the envelope. “Dear L, after careful consideration blur blur blur, you have not been successful in reaching interview stage blur blur blur…” – In a way I’m gutted but then I also expected it because DY (the wanker!) said he wasn’t going to support my re-application. Oh well, I won’t be trying again; it’s clearly not meant to be. At least this now allows me to focus on a new office job. I’m not happy at MRC and now I can allow Huntress to organise interviews for me. I won’t tell MRC I’m going to another office, I’ll tell them I’m going travelling or to work for AAA. I couldn’t stand the disappointment from them if I told them the truth. So now it’s between Property V and Mary something training company. Either one sounds quite cool. It will depend on the offices… hehe!
July 16th 2006 –
I’ve it all planned… if I get the job at Property V (where I haven’t even yet got an interview!!!) I will not drive to work but I will get a monthly train pass and get the train. This way, I will be able to walk to and from each station and therefore be exercising as well as saving petrol money?! Also, avoiding the traffic! This way, I wouldn’t waste money on the gym either… so I’ve completely thought about it! I haven’t however thought about if I decide Mary Gober International is the way forward?! Saying that, not even sure if Mary Gober is the company they are on about although what other customer service training companies are based in Frimley??! Oh who knows, I think Property V may be the way forward for me… it also pays better money so there’s always that!
July 17th 2006 –
I received 2 phonecalls from Huntress today. The first was from Sarah checking that I could attend an interview on Wednesday should Mary Gober (although company name still not confirmed) wish to meet with me (we’ll know tomorrow morning) and a second call at 12:30 from Mel saying that Property V LOVED my CV and would like to meet me Wednesday at 9am. I am definitely attending this interview after bullshitting an excuse to KC about my car needing a service (don’t know how I’m going to make that last until 11am?!) and hopefully I will get the job although SHITTING myself about what to say to KC and the rest of fucking MRC if I do. MM reminded me this afternoon why I’m not happy though. She sent me an email with 6 attachments requesting that I print the attachments for her meeting on Thursday… in the time it took her to right the email, she could have printed these herself!!! Un-fucking-believable! When did I become an official dogs body?!?! WHEN WHEN?!?!!?!?
July 18th 2006 –
Huntress called again – Sarah not Mel – she wanted me to attend an interview tomorrow, I can’t, I already have 1 tomorrow so it’s Friday or next week or not at all for the training company. I think I’ve sold myself the idea of Property V now so I’m not overly bothered! Told CLT and HL today all about Property V, they are both happy for me… also told them I plan on lying through my teeth to MRC when I leave… can’t bare to tell them the truth!
5pm – Just had a chat with Andrea from Huntress, she has ANOTHER interview for me! This one is at MH in Twyford! PERFECT Location and was on my ‘cool companies’ merge so they probably have my CV direct too! LOVE this one, possible interview on Thursday – They wanted to see me tomorrow as did Sarahs training company but I can’t make my ‘service’ excuse last all day with KC! Although I can say I’m collecting my car on Thursday night and leave at 5 which is cool cool! WOO HOO!
…Just for the record; I am WELL impressed with Huntress! Just received a good luck text from them for tomorrows interview! They have been SO proactive and I have 3 opportunities on the go! Choices, choices! Told TDC today in our ‘central support meeting’ that I am considering leaving to go travelling… that is a BIG little white lie! I hate lying, but have to do it!
July 19th 2006 –
3:42pm – Have been SWAMPED at work today but working at a very good speed as I’m feeling guilty for not getting in the office until 11am. My reason… dropping my car in for a service in Timbuktu – in reality, at an interview for a ‘team assistant’ role for Property V in Ascot. Not really sure of my feelings about this at the moment, part of me just wants this role so much but I’m not sure if it’s the right team environment for me and they might be a bit too much ‘public schoolboyish?!’ – I am therefore still going to attend the interview tomorrow morning (when I collect my car from Timbuktu!) at 8:30am for MH… this is less money but a bigger company and therefore possibly a better opportunity for me. It’s also MUCH nearer my house and the environment looks pretty cool… This could be very similar to Barratt Homes. I will ponder on both after the other interview!
The more I look at the MH website, the more I think this company will be better for me. I love that Property V is the leader in it’s field, but I just have a gut feeling that MH will be a better working environment and the benefits package etc are fantastic. I will enjoy this interview I think?
4pm – Okay. The more I think about it the more I know that Property V is NOT the right opportunity for me. I LOVE what the company do but I’m just not sure I am the right ‘fit’ for them and I can’t leave a team of people I LOVE for a team of nice people that I’m just not sure about. I won’t email Mel about this yet as that’s a bit too knee-jerk and I would like to know whether I would have been successful for a 2nd stage or perhaps an offer even.
July 20th 2006 –
I collected my car from the ‘garage’ this morning after it was serviced. In other words I attended my second 1st interview of the week but this time I REALLY DO want the job. My interview was for MH (see previous notes) and it went VERY well. I think this would be a fantastic career move for me and the role has LOTS of scope. (I really need to stop writing words in CAPITALS when I want to emphasise something!!!) – I will know late tomorrow or early next week. Fingers are TIGHTLY crossed!!! I could have finally found a career!!?!
11:02am – Just heard back from Huntress… I am favourite for the MH role… HOW EXCITING!
July 21st 2006 –
10:15am – I am an impatient bitch and therefore I’m going to email Huntress and ask what time the last interview at MH is today… I REALLY want to know whether I’ve got the job or not. Suddenly today I feel scared about leaving MRC. I guess it’s because its my comfort zone and although I hate the job, I LOVE the people. It will be sad again… but I’ll get leaving presents again!!! How funny!
10:27am – I just got an email back from Huntress… they said the last interview was at 9:15am this morning and they’re awaiting feedback… could come on soon.
11:30am – Lea from Huntress called to see if she can put me forward for a PA to Sales and Marketing Director role based in Bracknell for a very large corporate client. Salary is c.£25k and the company offer very good benefits. Orginally I said “go ahead” hoping that I wouldn’t have to actually go ahead anyway because I’m still fingers crossed for Millgate but then as an after thought I said “what’s the company called?” and she said, completely blasé about it… “DHL, very big company” – she then started trying to explain who they are like I don’t fucking know?! HELLO!!! I quickly changed my response to “No, no, no, sorry, you can’t send my CV there, they are MRC's biggest client, therefore I am the coordinator on that account through MRC and I speak to the Sales and Marketing Director daily!!! It would NOT be cool if they got my CV!” – she understood and thank goodness, no harm done!!!
1:50pm – I have just contacted Andrea from Huntress to chase whether she’s heard anything from MH; nothing heard at the moment but she’ll “keep me informed” – don’t these people understand that I want to know today?! God it’s so frustrating!
4:34pm – I have a voicemail from Andrea… the last interview is next Monday at 10am and that’s through another agency so I have to wait ALL WEEKEND to find out some news!!! Although, Andrea emailed me saying:
“I really want you to get the role, KS sounded very positive and you are still the favourite out of all the candidates so fingers crossed.
Hope you have a lovely weekend; try not to think about it too much!
Andrea”
…so I’m still the favourite candidate and very much in the running… Is she STUPID?!?! As if I’m not going to worry about it?! It’s at the forefront of my mind… must remember to tell Matt this weekend that I may have a new job, communication is key and ours is crap! LOL!
11:45pm – Checked my hotmail account and have an email from PB of MH. Don’t get too excited as he’s only responding to the following email I sent first:
“Dear PB
I just wanted to drop you a quick line to thank you for your time this morning. I found the interview very informative and I'm very excited about the opportunity within MH. I truly believe I could make the role in question my own and become a valuable part of the construction team.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Kind Regards
L"
…the response:
“Dear L,
Thank you for your e-mail. For your information we have now seen two further candidates with one more due at 10.30am on Monday. After that MT, TC and I will review all candidates and make our decision.
Hope you have a good weekend and we'll speak on Monday.
Regards,
PB"
…Well it was a day after my original email but still has a positive feel to it so I’m quite excited still that I should have the job. Started to tell MW about it last night but it’s definitely not as exciting over the phone so I told him he’d have to hear all about it on Sunday; he was clearly thrilled!
July 24th 2006 –
9:16am – Drove past the MH office this morning and got a nervous feeling in my tummy. Although I am anxious to get that job I am also nervous that I am considering leaving MRC which has been my comfort zone since October 04. Even when I left for Virgin I knew that I always had MRC so things were different but this time I’m leaving to work in a new office and I have concerns about the people and the role and the company – not because they seem bad (as they actually ALL seem amazing) but it’s natural to feel this way when you work in a company you love with people you love but just hate the role. I don’t like feeling like I don’t know what I’m doing and I know if I get my new job, for the first 3 months I won’t know what I’m doing which makes me nervous. Can’t wait to hear whether I’ve been successful though. Although, if Karma has it’s way I won’t be getting that job, especially since my row with K yesterday, I’m a bad person and therefore I don’t deserve a nice new job, I deserve to be miserable in my current job until K knows that I value her friendship.
2:14pm – It’s been a whirlwind of a day! I got a phonecall at just gone 11am from PB offering me the job at MH to start ASAP! I have since been shitting my pants about telling MRC I’m going travelling and have actually considered saying that I’m pregnant and going to be a housewife! It would be easier to tell them I was leaving as I was pregnant than it is to say I’m going travelling! But then H reminded me I would have so say something awful like I lost the baby OR go with my suggestion which was just bring a child each time I come to the office?! I fucking hate letting people down and I’m just dreading the look on KC's face!! So I’ve written a resignation letter – emailed it to KC with a bit “I’m sorry” email and I’m going to ensure I’m in the admin meeting with the girls when she reads it, hoping she’ll have calmed down and I won’t ACTUALLY SEE the steam coming out of her ears then when she reads it. Had a glass of wine at lunch with H, nearly never paid for lunch but H unfortunately reminded me so I went and paid. Also told CLT I’d “be back for G's funeral in October!” – obviously meaning Christening but my head is FUCKED at the moment. What with the new job, my argument with K and me being a fucking numb nut at telling people what I WANT to do I am a quivering wreck at the moment and realise I’m making no sense at the moment but I’m actually a bit pissed from lunch! …. So may get dismissed today anyway!
4:13pm – My head has finally disappeared up my arse today and I have NO idea what I’m doing?! I need to speak to KC about leaving but I’m currently avoiding her like a suicide bomber to the point where I hid behind a pillow in the car park whilst Helen had a fag as I knew she was in the office reading my resignation letter! She walked past the car park to go to Waitrose for some ‘fresh air’ – probably to chill out and avoid killing me! They have restructured and restructured for me and now, I’m off travelling! And I had an admin meeting where I sat and told H, P and LT where I’m going (of course H knows the truth so I couldn’t look her in the eye!!!) but P and LT were both very sweet about it although both in immediate panic mode about their own workloads! I then told them my ‘travel route’ and whilst on my fag break with H she said she nearly started believing I was telling the truth! She said she was sitting there thinking “how lucky, I wish I could go with her” – how funny, I’ve strated believing myself that on the 8th September I’m off to St Lucia, followed by Antigua, Miami, LA, San Francisco, Honolulu, Fiji, Sydney, Melbourne, Perth, Singapore, Bangkok and then home on 14th June next year. The ticket cost me £862 and the first flight is BA, the rest are Quantas. All was booked through STA Travel! I have to know all this information off by heart as I can’t slip up over the next month! I’ve actually been really stupid handing my notice in at the moment before my offer letter has been received fro MH but hey, I do everything on a whim and if the job falls through, maybe I WILL go travelling!!!
I think I need a holiday! My heads currently so far up my arse it’s crazy! I’ve spent the day flirting with Scott Hider of B2B events on the phone and via email and I referred to G’s funeral earlier instead of Christening when talking to CLT! I feel awful about it but she’s fine, says she knows how scatty I am and therefore makes allowances for me. That’s a fair point!
5:09pm – I have just got out of my meeting with KC. She has accepted my resignation but only because I’m going travelling! She said if I was leaving for anything else she wouldn’t have been so happy about it! I now have to have a meeting with KC and bastard JF on Wednesday about the plan of action for the next 4 weeks and I just know I’m going to end up in tears! He’s a bully when it comes to people leaving his company so nervous about that! I also need to email PB at MH now and tell him I can’t start until Tuesday 22nd August as my company has asked that I work the full 4 weeks to ensure that all my work is handed over effectively! BASTARDS!
5:12pm – Just had a sudden FEAR come over me that someone from MH will phone MRC and ask for a reference for me! I have put H down as my reference but what if they call and H’s not around and it could all be awful! I would have to leave and never come back if the truth came out after such a huge lie! FUCKETY FUCK!
July 25th 2006 –
9:47am – I feel absolutely AWFUL about this huge lie I now have to keep up for the next month! It’s hanging over me in a huge way and I’m shitting myself about MH contacting MRC for a reference rather than contacting H direct who of course knows the truth. I have therefore sent Huntress a hard copy and email copy of a reference written by me but signed by H in the hope that they’ll send that onto MH and that will be the end of it?! I just have a very bad feeling this one is going to come back and bite me REALLY fucking hard on the arse! Have already checked my email 16 times this morning to see if Huntress have mentioned my reference but nothing has been said as of yet so I’ll keep an eye on that! I also need my start date to be confirmed as 22nd August! I bet PB's not happy with me ALREADY! I’m starting to feel nervous about leaving MRC now but there’s just no turning back!
11:20am – Just came out of the MOST boring meeting I have ever been in with TDC and AB. Maybe it’s because they’re focusing on jobs I don’t give 2 hoots about or MAYBE it’s because I’m leaving to go ‘travelling’ next month and therefore my head is in the clouds? What I do know is I need to cheer the fuck up and work on the growing pile of binning sitting next to my desk but I just keep thinking if I don’t look at it, it will go away! I will start this evening working on doing half an hour a day until it’s gone though, I couldn’t possibly leave and let the girls sort it out…. Could I???
… Oooooh, just remembered it’s Tuesday and therefore Hello Mag comes out today! YAY! Also, sometimes OK! Comes out too so maybe I can buy both??!
5:12pm – Today I nearly had a fatal heart attack. Caused by Andrea at Huntress! I called her at lunch to check she got my reference via email and to check she’d forward it onto KS at MH and good job as she hadn’t yet!! I then get a voicemail from Andrea at about 2ish saying “Hi L it’s Andrea, I’m really sorry, KS didn’t read your email properly and she’s already contacted your references!!” – I then had an immediate attack of fear and got that horrible stomach churning feeling which I describe as ‘need a poo feeling’ and went to reception to call her. I played it cool (didn’t want to tell Andrea the story so had to make it seem like no big deal!) and thankfully, KS has only contacted AAA at the moment who gave me a GLOWING reference apparently?! Well AAA hasn’t called me about this which surprises me A LOT but she done the trick so that’s cool! KS will now contact me should she need to contact H for more information about my role at MRC but she’s generally pleased with the letter that was sent over and hopefully the 2 references will be enough! I should have my offer letter when I get home, I fucking hope so as I’ve handed my notice in! Can you imagine the nightmare if I couldn’t start at MH AND left MRC! I would be in recruitment agencies night and day; and couldn’t think of anything worse!
On another note, been speaking to NO'H today on messenger, I do miss NO'H being in Signet as her daily arguments and dramas with “I’m a fucking fat bitch whore” V were my entertainment and kept me sane. She&rsqu
, pictures and all!" - this sparked texting all night which finished at 12:30am this morning, by this point I'd had a lot to drink (out with G and the boys on my regular boys night) and got very close to telling OH I had a serious crush on him... managed not to, and can still look him in the eye on Monday without going a pretty shade of pink! 
